Recipes for Runners

David Has a Sweet Tooth

This isn't an excuse.

David's Chocolate Sludge Cake

Origins

It must be said from the outset that this recipe was inspired by one for chocolate biscuit cake (or something similar) in a Sainsbury's mini recipe book years ago. It now bears only a passing resemblance to that recipe.

Uses

Tempting though it looks, I really wouldn't recommend eating this other than after serious exercise. Unless you have significant weight-gain goals. And a very sweet tooth.

Ingredients

The ingredients can largely be sourced from The Shop. Use it or lose it.

What	How Much¹
golden syrup	one 1lb (454g) tin
digestive biscuits	one unopened 12" tube (400g)
butter	one ½lb (250g) packet
cocoa powder²	big dollop or two
dark brown sugar	2-3 big spoonfuls
ready to eat dates³	one bag
ready to eat prunes³	one bag
dried cranberries³	150g bag or so
roughly chopped fresh nuts³	100-200g or so
very dark chocolate	around 500-600g
¹ taken with a healthy pinch of salt (ie. none) ² no, not drinking chocolate. Don't you like your teeth? ³ The Healthy Stuff® See the text.

Equipment

This is not a cooked cake, but you will need a large pan to melt the syrup and butter in and stir it all up. I use our pressure cooker, which is the biggest hob-safe pan we have.

A durable spoon or stirrer or spatula will be needed. I managed to break one of our wooden paddles last time round (see left).

You will be preparing it into a 14" x 11" (approx.) lined baking tray. Use greaseproof paper, baking parchment or aluminium foil. Paper tends to peel off easier and is less of a shock when you nevertheless get some between your teeth. The lining should allow for around an inch or so deep of ingredients.

The Method

Firstly, a note about the instructions here: they're all a bit approximate. I don't really use a recipe; rather, I throw it all in and stir around until it looks about right. So don't get too hung up about the amounts, the order, the method - anything, really.

First, catch your hare

Get all the ingredients on the work surface. You wouldn't believe the mess I made when I forgot to do this once.

Bash, grind, chop

Beat the kitchen bench up with the packet of biscuits. This crushes them but leaves a few bigger bits for texture. Caveat, coque: sometimes the pack bursts open when you're smashing it on the bench.

Chop roughly the nuts, dates and prunes (or whichever of them you're using). Smaller berries can stay whole.

Melt

Put the golden syrup and butter in the pan over a medium heat and warm it through, stirring, until it has all melted. If the pan sizzles, it's too hot - you're melting it, not cooking it.

Turn the heat off.

Incorporate

Add the sugar and cocoa powder and make sure they're well dissolved and incorporated.

Stir in the biscuits, smashing up anything that is still too big. I usually put in only half to three quarters at first, in case there isn't enough gooey stuff to leave it a little moist. On the other hand, sometimes you're scratching your head wondering what else to put in to soak up the syrup and butter that's still slopping around.

Stir in ...

The Healthy Stuff

What passes for healthy stuff goes in now. You can add all or some of the ingredients listed, or think up your own. I doubt raw sprouts would be much good unless you chopped them well.

Variations

You might want to ring the changes. The obvious place to start is the list of "healthy" stuff - the berries, nuts, dates, etc. I have tried it with just dates and prunes, but that was rather sticky. It's OK with just cranberries and nuts. Really, the world is your oyster (no, I don't think so...).

You could try putting some flavouring in at the Incorporate stage. Vanilla is an obvious one; orange or other citrus flavour might work. Chili would probably be good for a bit of zing. If you find something you like, let me know.

Into the tin

Couverture

No, not really: you just melt the chocolate and pour it over the top. There are doubtless better ways to make a chocolate covering but this is, at least, easy.

It's good to have a really nice chocolate on top, but this can add hugely to the cost; I use 6 of the shop's 90% cocoa solids "Caley's Marching Chocolate", which is scrummy, if not cheap. Fiona thinks I should use Bournville. The advantage of a really high cocoa-content chocolate is that it's less sweet. There aren't many times you use chocolate to take the sweet edge off something, but this is one of them.

You surely don't need me to tell you how to melt chocolate and spread it over a cake. Here are some pictures anyway.

Late-breaking hint: if you want to avoid really sticky hands (why? you could lick them clean), break the chocolate before you take the wrappers off.

Patience is a virtue

Leave it overnight to set.

Put it under a cover; flies don't leave footprints: they leave flies.

If, in the morning, you find strange, pale patches all over the top it might just be you've put in so much butter or syrup that it's seeped up through to the surface. It hasn't happened to me for a while, so I guess the proportions are under control now. Oh, it's not a problem if it has done that (unless you eat it - think of the calories!)

If you don't have a lot of time and it's very hot, you might want to put it in the freezer. It cuts better frozen and I routinely serve it frozen at the L2SOTM.

Carve it up

Take it out of the tin by putting a cutting board over it and inverting it. Then you can cut it into small pieces from the sludge side. This tends to wreck the chocolate coating less. Now pop it back in the freezer.

Discard

Pack it into a tin and hide it. Unless you are running a marathon today, you'll not be wanting to eat it.

That's all folks!

I hope you've enjoyed this journey though the making of David's Sludge Cake. If you've enjoyed it enough (or, if you haven't) to make some comments, you can contact me at the usual place.